People Are Laughing at ECZ’s Campaign Timetable Like Zambia Has Never Used a Schedule Before
These days, the moment government introduces anything involving order, timetables, or coordination, some citizens react like vampires seeing sunlight for the first time. The announcement that ECZ has prepared campaign timetables for political parties immediately turned social media into a comedy festival. One person joked, “Soon politicians will need an appointment just to wave at people.” Another said, “Campaigns have now become Grade 9 boarding school.” Meanwhile Common Sense was quietly drinking tea and asking:
How exactly do people expect dozens of political parties to campaign freely across the country without proper coordination?
Because let us be honest. Campaign periods in Zambia are not peaceful library discussions. Campaigns are loud. Convoys become longer than funeral processions. Cadres suddenly discover hidden talents in dancing on moving vehicles. Every roadside speaker starts sounding like it was borrowed from a nightclub in Matero. Now imagine three major political rallies accidentally entering the same small township at the same time. One group is blowing whistles, another is chanting slogans, another convoy has blocked the road, and somewhere in the middle a confused goat is trying to cross the street peacefully. Before you know it, confusion starts growing faster than rumours in a barber shop.
That is exactly why timetables exist.
Imagine a wedding venue with no schedule. One bride arrives at 10:00 with drummers. Another wedding convoy enters at 10:15 with dancers and smoke machines. The caterers start serving chicken to the wrong family. One pastor is preaching while another DJ is playing “Tatata.” By lunchtime even the bride’s uncle is threatening to report everyone to the village headman. Organization is not oppression. It is prevention of chaos.
Even buses use schedules. Football leagues use fixtures. Airports coordinate flights. Imagine if pilots simply announced, “I felt spiritually led to land now,” without clearance from the control tower. Zambia Airways and International Disaster would become the same thing overnight.
And honestly speaking, elections involve emotions, crowds, vehicles, music, security, and strong political competition. ECZ is therefore trying to create fairness and avoid unnecessary clashes by coordinating campaign movements properly. That is not dictatorship. That is management. In fact, the funny thing is that the same people mocking timetables would be the first ones complaining if two rival rallies collided and caused confusion in their area.
Common Sense therefore says:
Freedom does not mean disorder.
A country cannot run national campaigns like a family WhatsApp group where everyone talks at the same time and nobody understands anything.
Democracy without coordination quickly becomes noise wearing party regalia and holding a loudspeaker.
